This week has been hard for me when I did not expect it to be.  I started off this week feeling proud that I did so much school work and studying during the weekend, even to the point where my homework was done before 8 pm.  And yes that is a big deal for me, because it was difficult and there was a lot to do.  But I was proud.

And then Tuesday hit, and all that hard work disappeared.  I feel into a slump and I felt off.  I was well physically.  But there was a problem for me emotionally.  And I can’t describe it too people.  I was just sad.  Really really sad.  I was interest in nothing.  I could not understand my school work.  And all my problems were just affecting me and it placed me at a low point that I have ever felt.  And that night, my friend, probably only friend, tried to cheer me up.  It may not have cured it, but it helped, more than she knew.

And then Wednesday.  I felt better.  My problems were kind of fixed, but not totally fixed.  And I still could not understand one thing during my accounting class.  I tried, but I could not.

And then Thursday, I started to understand, but when I just started getting it, we learned something new, I was placed back in the same place again.  I still can’t understand the work when everyone seems to have understood it.  But then again how much do they really understand.  After a disastrous accounting class, I had economics lessons, which I just could not have been bothered by, since I was tired.  And then I had a horrible driving lesson less than 15 minutes after arriving home, for the first time in a month.  So my confidence obviously went down a ton.

And now today.  I do not feel that better.  I am supposed to be studying, but I have not opened a book yet for my accounting, that horrible word once again, internal assessment.  And now I am learning that because I did not take math, I can’t take a lot of business programs. Yay. Just my luck that what I am actually good at, I can’t actually do at school

What I am just trying to say is that this week has been really hard for me.  Probably the hardest in a long while.  And I am trying to be happy.  I am trying to be positive, but I just can’t.  It is like bad things are just meant for me.

< PS. Let me know what you think. >

xoxo 4

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