27th November 2017 | 11:45 PM

Today, I looked back on some old messages. Conversations with Z. I remember them clearly. I remember the feelings. It still makes me smile. I saved the messages from when we first started speaking, that’s how I have them now. Not going to pretend, things are strained between is, and it sucks. But this time, I just can’t force it. If its going to happen, its going to happen. And no, I not really sure what it is honestly. Maybe its him, maybe its me. 

All that has happened taught me something important. You can’t force someone to speak to you. If they want to, they will and if they don’t you have to respect that choice.

If he did not want to speak to me, that would be his problem, not mine. What he would be missing out on, I don’t really know, if there’s anything at all. I’ve lost so many friends before, so I’m used to it by now. And the second and most important part is that no one owes you anything. He does not owe it to me to be a part of my life. It’s not like we’re a thing. And that’s the truth, no matter how hard it is to accept.

I’m not upset with him. If that’s what he thinks, and asks about the strain between the two of us, thats what I will say, because thats the truth.

xoxo 4

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